The qualities that attract are out-flowing, buoyant; the qualities that repel are in-flowing; that is, people who have no magnetism are self-centered, they think too much about themselves; they do not give out enough; they are always after something, absorbing, receiving some benefit, trying to get some advantage for themselves. They lack sympathy, lack cordiality, good fellowship; they are bad mixers.
Some people are naturally magnetic, but when you analyze their character you will find they possess certain qualities which we all instinctively admire, the qualities which attract every human being, such as generosity, magnanimity, cordiality, broad sympathies, large views of life, helpfulness, optimism.
There is not one of these qualities that the salesman can not cultivate and strengthen a great deal. If he does so he will get a hearing where others have thrown back at them the fatal words, “No time to see you to-day—very busy.”
Many upright, honorable young men with political aspirations have been thwarted in their election campaign because they did not know how to make themselves popular. Splendid young men, striving for political honors, are constantly being beaten by men much their inferior in many respects. And this not because of graft or pull on their opponents’ side, but because the latter are good mixers. They know how to meet people, how to be good fellows, how to mix with others; in short they know how to make themselves popular.
We all know what a great demand there is in every line of business for traveling salesmen who are good mixers, men who have a genius for interesting, attracting and holding customers.
Whatever your business, your reputation and your success will depend in a great degree upon the quality of the impression you make upon others. It means everything, therefore, to young men, and to young women also, to develop a magnetic, forceful personality.
This is not a very difficult thing to do. Every one can cultivate the ability to please and the strength of character that will make him felt as a real force in the world. Knowing the qualities and characteristics that distinguish the magnetic and the unmagnetic, it is comparatively easy for us to cultivate the one and to eliminate the other. That is, we can cultivate the generous, magnanimous, cheerful, helpful mental qualities and crush their opposites; and in proportion as we do this we shall find ourselves becoming more interested in others, and they in turn becoming more interested in us. We shall find ourselves more welcome wherever we go, more sought after; we shall attract people to us more and more, as we make ourselves personal magnets by fashioning our aura of the kindly thoughts and words and deeds that day by day go to the making of a rich, magnetic personality.
In other words, if you cultivate the qualities which you admire so much in others, the very qualities which attract you, you will become attractive to others. Just in proportion as you become imbued with these qualities so that they shall characterize you, will you acquire a magnetic, attractive personality.
A good education is a great advantage to a man or a woman, but most of us put too great emphasis upon education, upon mental equipment and training. We seem to think that this is everything, but our personal atmosphere may have more to do with our success in life, more to do with determining our place in the world, our social or business advancement, our standing in our community, than our mere mental equipment.