ALGERNON.
Your brother is a little off colour, isn’t he, dear Jack? You won’t be able to disappear to London quite so frequently as your wicked custom was. And not a bad thing either.
JACK.
As for your conduct towards Miss Cardew, I must say that your taking in a sweet, simple, innocent girl like that is quite inexcusable. To say nothing of the fact that she is my ward.
ALGERNON.
I can see no possible defence at all for your deceiving a brilliant, clever, thoroughly experienced young lady like Miss Fairfax. To say nothing of the fact that she is my cousin.
JACK.
I wanted to be engaged to Gwendolen, that is all. I love her.
ALGERNON.
Well, I simply wanted to be engaged to Cecily. I adore her.
JACK.
There is certainly no chance of your marrying Miss Cardew.
ALGERNON.
I don’t think there is much likelihood, Jack, of you and Miss Fairfax being united.
JACK.
Well, that is no business of yours.
ALGERNON.
If it was my business, I wouldn’t talk about it. [Begins to eat muffins.] It is very vulgar to talk about one’s business. Only people like stock-brokers do that, and then merely at dinner parties.
JACK.
How can you sit there, calmly eating muffins when we are in this horrible trouble, I can’t make out. You seem to me to be perfectly heartless.