“Well, mother, what’s wrong in that?”
“You know very well, Phil, that ‘Blast us’ is not in the Bible at all, and that it is a very awful species of slang swearing.”
“So the telegraph clerk thought,” returned Phil, “but when my City friend pointed out that Blastus was ‘the king’s chamberlain’ they were obliged to let the telegram go. ‘Blastus’ stands for ‘superior quality,’ and ‘unholy’ for ‘Offer is open for three days from time of despatch of telegram.’ Using the same code, if a merchant wants to ask a Calcutta friend the question—‘How is the coming crop as regards extent and appearance?’ he merely telegraphs the word ‘Hamlet.’ If he wishes to say ‘Bills of lading go forward by this mail, Invoices will follow,’ he has only to telegraph ‘Heretic.’ For the most part, the compilers of these codes seem to have used the words arbitrarily, for the word ‘Ellwood’ has no visible connection with the words ‘Blue Velvet,’ which it represents; neither is there connection between ‘Doves’ and ‘French Brandy,’ nor between ‘Collapse’ and ‘Scotch Coals,’ though there does seem to have been a gleam of significance when they fixed on ‘Downward’ to represent ‘Irish Whisky.’”
“That’s true, Phil, there was a touch of sense there, if not sarcasm,” said the widow heartily, for she was an abhorrer of strong drink!
“Then, mother, think of the saving of time accomplished by the telegraph. In days not long past, if a merchant in India wished to transact business with another in New York he had to write a letter which took months to make the voyage out, and his correspondent had to write a reply which took about the same time to return. Now, not long ago the head of an Indian house wanted a ship-load of something (I forget what) from New York. He telegraphed a few unconnected words to my City friend in London. If there had been no obstruction of any kind the message could have been flashed from Bombay to London in a few seconds; as it was, it made the journey in three hours. My friend, who received it in the forenoon, telegraphed to New York, transacted the business, received a reply from New York, and telegraphed back to Bombay that the order was given and in process of execution before five p.m. on the same day. Thus a commercial transaction between India and America, via England, involving, perhaps, thousands of pounds, was completed at the cost of a few pounds between breakfast and dinner. In other words, Bombay aroused New York to action by means of a flash of electricity within twenty-four hours.”
“Phil,” remarked Mrs Maylands, with a sigh, “don’t you think that man has now made almost all the discoveries that it is possible to make?”
“Why, no, mother, I think he is only on the threshold of discovery yet. The thought has sometimes come into my mind with tremendous power, that as God is infinite, and His knowledge infinite, there is, as it were, a necessity that we shall go on learning something new for ever!—But that is too deep a subject to enter on just now,” said Phil, rising, “for I must go and send off my telegram to May—she will be anxious to hear about you, poor girl. You must not be troubled when you see how the roses have faded from her cheeks. She is in good enough health, but I fear the telegraph service is too heavy for her, and the City air is not so bracing as that of the west of Ireland.”
Mrs Maylands was quite prepared for the change referred to, for she knew, what Phil did not know, that it was neither the telegraph nor the City that had robbed May of the bloom of youth and health.