Mme. de Calouas heard and saw her, and knew that Odette had come here to weep for her husband. As they went out she said to her:
"You loved him much, then?"
And by these words Odette realized that she had been weeping for an immeasurable loss, which had left her in a sense benumbed.
[VIII]
This did not last long, and as soon as she reached home she made honorable amends to Jean. She drove from her every thought except of him, denouncing the universal conspiracy against her beloved memories. What could she do to mitigate the misfortunes of others, however great and innumerable they might be? Those women who seemed to deny their own griefs filled her with a sort of dismay.
She passed hours of sleeplessness revolving these ideas, determining at whatever cost to master herself, and forget the whole distracted world. She fell asleep vowing henceforth to belong wholly to the memory of Jean.
Yet the next morning, Sunday, coming out of church, she found no rest till she had met Mme. de Calouas and asked her:
"Could I be of use to you at the hospital?"
"I was expecting you," Mme. de Calouas replied. "I would do nothing to bring you before the time; but I am glad that you wish to come. I will begin by taking you under my wing; for your initiation you shall be my helper. Does that suit you?"
"Of course. I do not know how to do anything."