Then came appeals upon the points,
New trials on the facts;
More points, more learned arguments,
More precedents and Acts.
But Law, thou art a tender plant
That needs must droop and die;
And bear no fruit unless thy root
Be watered constantly:
And Bumpkin with a generous hand
Had given thee good supply;
He drained the well, and yet withal
The noble Prigg was dry.
With plaintive look would move a stone,
Tom gazed on Lawyer Prigg:
Who rubbed his hands and said, “You see,
It’s not so much the pig.”
“Noa, noa, it be th’ horses moore,
The calf and sheep and kine,
Where be th’ hay-rick and the straw?
And where thic bull o’ mine?”
The Lawyer said, “Quite so, quite so!”
Looked wise, and wisely grinned;
For Tom was like a ship becalmed,
He stopped for want of wind.
“You see,” said Prigg with gravity
Would almost make you laugh,
“Our leading Counsel had the Cow,
The junior had the Calf.
“The hay and straw Rules nisi got,
Made Absolute with corn,
The pigs made Interrogat’ries,
Most beautifully drawn.
“The Bacon—ah, dear Bumpkin, few
In Law suits ever save it;
It made together with the sow,
A splendid Affidavit.
“The cocks and hens the Pleadings did
Most exquisitely utter;
And some few pans of cream there were,
Which made the Surre-butter.”