“‘You impudent jackanapes!’ she exclaimed, as she observed me toss off a bumper. ‘This exceeds every thing I ever heard of.’
“‘I always strive to excel, Floss,’ I replied, flinging myself at full length on a sofa. But come here. Come to me like a good girl. I have something to say to you.’
“‘Go to you! I’ll see you farther first!’ she cried, looking as disdainfully as she could.
“‘Very well,’ said I, rising and retreating a few paces: ‘now come to me—you see me further.’
“‘I shan’t do any thing of the kind, Mr. Impudence,’ she exclaimed, trying to hide her laughter.
“‘Then if you wo’n’t come to me, I shall be obliged to go to you, which is a great hardship,’ I observed as I advanced towards her.
“‘If you come near me I’ll scratch your eyes out!’ cried Floss, looking monstrously fierce; yet I could easily see by the corners of her mouth that she was very much disposed to laugh, so I still approached.
“‘If you touch me I’ll box your ears!’ she exclaimed, beginning to look more serious.
“‘Don’t be alarmed, Floss; you wouldn’t hurt a hair of my head, I know,’ said I, as I attempted to insinuate my arm round her waist. ‘Ha, will you?’ she cried; and she gave me a slap of the face that made my teeth rattle in my mouth like a box of cherry stones. I was not to be easily driven from my purpose, so I attempted to make good my hold, but immediately received a box on the ear that made me see all the colours of the rainbow.
“‘You haven’t the heart to hurt a fly,’ said I very coolly, while I endeavoured to throw my left arm over her left shoulder, to get the command of her arms; but in the execution of this manœuvre, I received a shower of blows that would have made a less eager lover than myself glad enough to leave the field.