"The cause of the Peasants' Revolt was that a shilling poultice should be put on everybody over sixteen."
"Henry VIII. was a very good king. He liked plenty of money, he had plenty of wives, and died of ulcers in the legs."
"Edward III. would have been king of France if his mother had been a man."
"Doomsday Book.—A book signifying that each man should have seven feet of land for a grave."
"Alexander the Great was born in the absence of his parents."
"What followed the murder of Becket?" "Henry II. received wacks with a birch."
"What is a watershed?" "A shed for keeping water in."
"A watershed is a house between two rivers so that a drop of water falling on one side of the roof runs into one river, and a drop on the other side goes into the other river."
"The battle of Waterloo was fought off Cape Trafalgar. Nelson led up one squadron and Collingwood the other. When it was over Wellington rode over the field by moonlight, and met Blucher, the French general, and they shook hands and were friends ever after."