A Diversity of Creatures

by Rudyard Kipling

'Confine yourself at present to the soldier of Crassus.'

'Yes, sir. Et, and--consenuit, has he grown old--in armis, in the--er--arms--hositum socerorum, of his father-in-law's enemies.'

'Who? How? Which?'

'Arms of his enemies' fathers-in-law, sir.'

'Tha-anks. By the way, what meaning might you attach to in armis?'

'Oh, weapons--weapons of war, sir.' There was a virginal note in Beetle's voice as though he had been falsely accused of uttering indecencies. 'Shall I take the bracket now, sir?'

'Since it seems to be troubling you.'

'Pro Curia, O for the Senate House--inversique mores, and manners upset--upside down.'

'Ve-ry like your translation. Meantime, the soldier of Crassus?'

'Sub rege Medo, under a Median King--Marsus et Apulus, he being a Marsian and an Apulian.'