Good Form and Christian Etiquette

by S. M. I. Henry

“Be a Christian” is an easy answer to the question, “How shall I conduct myself in such and such a case?” But a man may be a Christian, and yet, for the lack of some specific instruction in certain forms of procedure, perpetrate a blunder which will bring the laugh from the profane whom he wished to arouse to sober thought; or make a mistake, such as will carry and widely scatter a serious misunderstanding by which Christ will be reproached and his work hindered.

I am confident that in every home among all good Christian people there is a genuine desire to attain to the best training in everything that will make this best of all work go swiftly to the ends of the earth; but I am also sure that many have failed to appreciate that “the cause” has a right to be carried by the most perfect methods to which it is possible to attain. The truth is worthy of the best of all “good form” in home, church, and social life. Good form does not consist so much in putting on, as in putting off—keeping off—those things in deportment, speech, and association which are especially ungraceful, unwinsome, incorrect, and improper.

Social good form, although it seems to be of the world, worldly, represents just what Christ would do if he were living among men and women in ordinary social relations. The world has taken the best that worldly wisdom can comprehend of the Christ-life, and carefully embodied it in a certain code to which it professes to hold itself; to which it does hold itself in public, whatever it may do behind the scenes.

It is manifestly true that the man who has the mind of Christ ought to grow, apple-tree fashion, as much of courtesy, gentleness, and all that goes to make an agreeable appearance, as the world can possibly buy in the market of good manners, tie on and wear, Christmas-tree fashion.

It is by his first appearance that the colporteur will open or close a door to the truth which he carries in a book, or in samples of health food. His manner in the homes where he is entertained, in public, on the train, the street, at camp-meeting, or on the platform, will close or open the hearts of even the hungry to the spiritual food which the minister is sent forth to serve in the Master’s name. The manner of those who occupy the field will play no insignificant part in the work of building up the school, the college, the mission, and in reaching the uttermost parts with the gospel; and since the children now under training in the homes of Christian workers must have a share in the work of God in this time when it means more than it ever did for the servants of God to carry weights and hindrances, it seems a good thing to take up the consideration of what constitutes “Good Form,” or practical Christian conduct.

I have had my attention called to this subject by questions from young people, as well as parents; and this message concerning how to meet people and handle the things of this mundane sphere is to both parent and child, boys, girls, and young people, who are preparing for earnest work in the world.

II.

Social life is important to the young; it can not be safely ignored in school life, therefore I must have these interests in mind as I write, and shall hope to help both the anxious parent and the thoughtful young student who would know how to do the right thing at all times.

It is, however, a great deal more important to be than to do; for it is out of the being that the doing must come. The point requiring the most anxious consideration is that we may learn to truly know and love the principle upon which safe conduct depends.

He who loves purity for its own sake—who hates impurity because of its vileness, instead of for the painful consequences which follow its practise, will never go very far astray from those manners which are of good report in any society on earth. He will instinctively avoid the appearance of evil as far as he knows how evil appears.