Those who are old enough to study this book, are old enough to take the matter in to their own hands, and remedy the defects and supply the deficiencies of their early education. We beg them to commence at once, and at home.
Allow no false ideas of "liberty and equality" to cause you to forget for a moment the deference due to your father and your mother. The fifth commandment has not been and can not be abrogated. We commend to you the example of the Father of his Country. Look into the life of Washington, and mark what tender and respectful attentions characterized his intercourse with his only surviving parent. He never, we venture to say, spoke of his mother as "the old woman," or addressed her with incivility. "Never," an old friend of yours adjures you, "let youthful levity or the example of others betray you into forgetfulness of the claims of your parents or elders to a certain deference." Nature, a counselor still more sage, we doubt not, has written the same injunction upon your heart. Let your manners do justice to your feelings!
"Toward your father," that polished and courtly "gentleman of the old school," the author of the "American Gentleman's Guide to Politeness and Fashion," says, "preserve always a deferential manner, mingled with a certain frankness indicating that thorough confidence—that entire understanding of each other, which is the best guarantee of good sense in both, and of inestimable value to every young man blessed with a right-minded parent. Accept the advice dictated by experience with respect, receive even reproof without impatience of manner, and hasten to prove afterward that you cherish no resentful remembrance of what may have seemed to you too great severity or a too manifest assumption of authority.... In the inner temple of home, as well as where the world looks on, render him reverence due.
"There should be mingled with the habitual deference and attention that marks your manner to your mother the indescribable tenderness and rendering back of care and watchfulness that betokens remembrance of early days. No other woman should ever induce you to forget this truest, most disinterested friend, nor should your manner ever indicate even momentary indifference to her wishes or her affection."
III.—BROTHERS AND SISTERS.
The intercourse of brothers and sisters should be marked by the frankness and familiarity befitting their intimate relation; but this certainly does not preclude the exercise of all the little courtesies of life. Young man, be polite to your sister. She is a woman, and all women have claims on you for courteous attentions; and the affection which exists between you adds tenfold to the sacredness of the claims she has upon you, not only for protection, but for the exercise toward her of all the sweet amenities of life. Except your mother and your wife or affianced mistress (if you have one), no one can possibly have an equal right to your attentions. If you are young and have neither wife nor lady-love, let your mother and your sisters be to you the embodiment of all that is tenderest, most beautiful, and best in the human world. You can have no better school than your daily intercourse with them, to fit you for female society in general. The young man who loves his sisters and always treats them with the politeness, deference, and kindness which is their due, is almost certain to be a favorite with their sex generally; so, as you value your reputation for good manners and your success with other ladies, fail in no act of courtesy to your sisters.
The gentle and loving sister will need no injunction to treat an affectionate, polite, and attentive brother with the tender and respectful consideration which such a brother deserves. The charming little courtesies which you practice so gracefully in your intercourse with other gentlemen will not, you may be sure, be lost upon him. True politeness is never lost, and never out of place; and nowhere does it appear more attractive than at home.
Stiff formality and cold ceremoniousness are repulsive anywhere, and are particularly so in the family circle; but the easy, frank, and genial intercourse of the fireside, instead of being marred, is refined and made still more delightful by courtesy.
IV.—THE HUSBAND AND WIFE.
Reader, are you married? But excuse us, if the question is not a proper one. If you are not, you doubtless hope to be, sooner or later, and therefore we will address you just as if you were.