In commencing a new service, determine to do your duty in it; and avoid every thing that you found was displeasing in your former place. Judge of your employers from your own observation, and their behaviour to you, and not from any idle reports you may hear to their prejudice. Should you find yourself in a reputable situation, but yet are uncomfortable, through the unkind or unfeeling tempers of your superiors, double your own diligence and civility, and avoid every thing, as much as possible, that might, however unwarrantably, excite their suspicion. By this you may improve their temper and conduct towards yourself; and the very vexation they have occasioned, may dispose them to make their domestics more comfortable, and themselves more happy.
Endeavour to serve with such good will, readiness of mind, and attention to the lawful interest and convenience of your employers, as to render your services almost necessary to them; that they may know and feel that they are blessed, above many of their neighbours, in having gotten a good servant, one who serves, not with eye-service as a man-pleaser, but in simplicity of heart as a Christian. You will be sure to gain esteem by cheerfully doing any lawful necessary service; though it were not agreed for when you were hired.
Whatever qualifications you may possess, if you are not scrupulously honest, you will soon be detected—considered as worthless—and dismissed your service. No civility or diligence can be a recompence for dishonesty. The more you are entrusted, the more careful you should be to maintain the confidence reposed in you. Avoid all lotteries, gaming, and secret modes of spending money. Take care that you are not deceived by the name of privileges and perquisites, beyond what was agreed upon.
A waste of household necessaries, and the breaking of articles through carelessness, are a sort of robbery of your employer—raise bad passions—and mostly deprive a servant of many extra encouragements that she would otherwise receive. These things are therefore to be strictly guarded against. There should be painted over every kitchen fire-place, “want not—waste not.”
Every employer has a right to establish rules for his household; therefore, do nothing in your master’s house, or with your mistress’s business, that you feel obliged to conceal, to keep your situation; for then, you may depend upon it, whatever it be, it is wrong in itself, and will bring you to harm.
Industry is necessary for all, that they may lead a useful life; but it is especially needful to those who engage to serve others. Idleness hath clothed many with rags. Your wages are the yearly pay for your honesty, and your time; therefore lying late in bed, or being over long on errands, or making frivolous excuses to be from home, have occasioned many suspicions—deprived many of good places, and eventually of good characters. “He that is slothful in his work is brother to him that is a great waster.” Exercise due diligence as to what are the particular duties of your station. Make it your study to put it out of the power of a reasonable mistress to find fault.
Dress as becomes your station, if you desire to please your employers,—to avoid personal harm, and to diminish the number and power of your temptations. The happiness of society arises from each of us keeping in our station, and being contented with it. Among other ways of shewing your wisdom, dressing clean and neat, is of the greatest importance. By this means, you may save a little money to assist your relations, or yourself when unemployed, or in time of need.[3]
Mildness of behaviour will help you through many difficulties. If your temper be hasty, your duty and interest are to govern and subdue it. Our comfort requires us to be patient with other people, and very watchful over our own tempers. “Do all things without murmuring or disputing. A soft answer turneth away wrath, but grievous words stir up strife.” Mere hastiness of temper and of tongue, or the neglect to consider consequences, has crowded the gaols with malefactors,—the streets with prostitutes,—and the workhouses with poor.
Young Persons, Female Servants, and others of a similar rank in life, we more especially address ourselves to you! You think with horror of murder, and of prostitution; but you perhaps little reflect, that idleness and self-will,—that the love of dress, and of indulgence,—that petty acts of dishonesty,—that misbehaviour in a place—that refusing to submit to reproof,—that rashly throwing yourselves out of a situation in a regular family,—that wasting your money, and thus leaving yourselves unprovided for when out of employment,—that breaking the Sabbath, and particularly rambling about in idle company on the evenings of the Sabbath-day—you perhaps little reflect that these, or any of these evil practices, or habits, may lead you, and that by no very long or winding path, to the atrocious crimes which I have mentioned. Act therefore on consideration and reason, and not by passion. You know not how you may irritate, and what mischief may follow. Many a servant has lost a comfortable home, and a mistress a useful assistant, by suffering passion to run headlong into imprudent expressions. You are more interested in retaining a good service, than your employer in retaining you; for she will continue to find suitable servants, while you may be depriving yourself, for a long time, of bread!
A female servant should never make friendships with, or take the advice of, milk people, butchers’ or bakers’ servants, keepers of chandlers’ shops, green-stalls, charwomen, &c.; for mostly they seek only their own interest and profit in every thing. If any proposal that is new, or unexpectedly profitable, force itself on your notice, do not act on your own opinion, nor hastily, but, confidentially, consult your mistress, or some relation, else you may be as hastily ensnared to your utter undoing.