If we may form any opinion from expressions in his letters, dating from this time to the day of his death, Gordon's religion brought him that "peace of mind which passeth all understanding," and which the world can neither give nor take away. The following are but specimens of many remarks which he let fall from time to time on this subject:—
"I may say that I have died suddenly over a hundred times; but in these deaths I have never felt the least doubt of my salvation."
"I would that all had the full assurance of life. It is precisely because we are despicable and worthless that we are accepted. Till we throw over that idea that we are better than others, we can never have that assurance."
Nor must it be thought that the joy and happiness he experienced in religion arose from any inward sense of self-satisfaction. Never had a man a humbler estimate of himself than Gordon, but his faith in this respect took a very healthy form. Instead of morbidly looking into his own heart for evidences of his union with Christ, he ever kept his eye on the precious work of his Saviour for him. Space will not permit many quotations from his writings, so the two following must suffice. The one was written soon after his conversion, the other near the end of his life.
"May 3, 1867.—We are born corrupt, and, if the devil had his way, we should be kept in ignorance of it; our permitted transgressions show us our state; it is the root that is evil, and evil must be its emanations, yet we feel much more oppressed by the outward sin than by the inward corruption."
"May 7, 1883.—Give me a ream of foolscap and I will sign it: it may be filled with my demerits and unworthiness, which I agree to; but my so doing is a proof of how much I accept the free gift of God. Unless our Lord's sufferings were in vain, it is just that sheet of demerits that I have signed which gives me my right to Him; had I a clean sheet I should have no right to Him."
Gordon's, however, was not a faith which contents its possessor merely with a sense of the forgiveness of sins. That he possessed this happy assurance, is evident. But no sooner had he entered into possession of some of his privileges as a child of God, than he pressed on to obtain more spiritual advantages. The indwelling of God in his heart was a truth to which he attached much importance, and the following extracts are but specimens of much that might be quoted showing that he held the same truth from a period very soon after his father's death to the year which preceded his own death.
"July 31, 1867.—I have had very nice thoughts on 1 John iv. 13—'Whosoever shall confess that Jesus is the Son of God, God dwelleth in him, and he in God.' I think it is the key to much of the Scripture. I am more than ever convinced that the secret of happiness and holiness is in the indwelling of God. The same truth is shown in many other verses, but the above, to my mind, shows it more clearly. Let a man seek the teaching of the Holy Spirit on such verses, and he will grow much in grace. As we believe that text, so we shall realise the presence of God in our hearts, and, having Him there, we have as a sequence holiness and love. He alone can make us believe the truth and keep it in mind."
"March 15, 1882.—It had struck me before, in 1865, that the ordinary Christian life of non-assurance was not a sufficient gain to have come from Christ's incarnation and death; then I learnt assurance, then followed the knowledge of His indwelling, then the solution in my mind of the problem of the safety of others; and then I halted, having given up the thought that in this life it was possible to regenerate the body, putting down its failings as venial and connected with our human infirmities. In time it came to me that surely some growth, some improvement, ought to be made, some increased sanctification ought to be expected, one ought not to be so very barren; glimpses of selfishness, self-seeking pride, and a certain weariness of one's châteaux d'Espagne came to me, and led to this—Christ dwelleth in us, and His light enlightens all dark places."
He held very strongly the teaching of the Apostle in Rom. vii., that we have two natures contending for the mastery, the one good and the other evil. Writing to his sister he says:—