“‘“She didn’t die a natural death at all, but was caught in a net and sold to a fishmonger, the same as everyone belonging to me, both young and old, and the list includes aunts and uncles, first and second cousins, fathers-in-law and mothers-in-law, and they the first blight on a man’s happiness. And here I am now,” ses he, “and I a poor orphan and the last of my name and race.” And then the tears began to come to his eyes, and when he had stopped weeping he up and ses: “Do you know,” ses he, “that I’m a misanthrope?”
“‘“I’m not a bit surprised at that,” ses I, “if, as you say, all belonging to you were philanthropists, and gave up their lives for the sustenance and maintenance of the people in the great world beyond. Indiscriminate philanthropy like that would make a pessimist of any one. Howsomever, things might be better or worse. You might have been caught in a net yourself, and sold to a family of tinkers, and I’m sure all your relations wouldn’t bother their heads about you, or care whether you were boiled or fried. They would logically conclude that as they were so numerous, they could afford to lose at least one of the family,” ses I.
“‘“About that I haven’t the remotest doubt,” ses he. “But what I can’t understand is why some women will marry their husbands so that they can help their own sisters’ or brothers’ children, as the case may be.”
“‘“Well,” ses I, “once women arrive at the age of indiscretion, there’s no use trying to understand them.”
“‘“Of course,” ses he, “the great trouble with women, I’m thinking, is that they don’t understand themselves or any one else, either.”
“‘“Be all that and more as it may,” ses I, “even the most foolish women are well able to look after themselves. But old talk like this would never get me home. And unless you will take me on your back and swim with me to the shore, ’tis the way I’ll be after dying both from cold and starvation.”
“‘“There was many a better man died from hunger,” ses he. “And better men have died from believing all their wives told them. Howsomever, I will take you to the shore on one condition.”
“‘“And what may that be?” ses I.
“‘“Well,” ses he, “you must promise that you will never again taste a piece of fish while you live.”
“‘“Why, that’s an easy matter,” says I. “Sure, of course, I’ll promise you that much, or as much more if you like.”