Sold Again.—During the annual examination the children in the Fifth Standard were asked to give an example of a sentence containing more than one subject. This, the inspector thought, would constitute a poser. Instantly, however, up rose a ragged, shock-headed "hoyden," who straightway began to quote from Browning's "Pied Piper":—
"'Great rats, small rats, lean rats, brawny rats,
Brown rats, black rats, grey rats, tawny rats,
Grave old plodders, gay young friskers,
Fathers, mothers, uncles, cousins,
Cocking tails and pricking whiskers,
Families by tens and dozens,
Brothers, sisters, husbands, wives,
Followed the Piper for their lives.'"
The School House was Exempt.—The master of a village school in the vicinity of Dundee was in the habit of giving out an essay to be written at home by the pupils of the first class. One Friday afternoon he gave as the subject for the weekly exercise, "Local Events." At that time scarlet fever was very prevalent in the district. One pupil of promising parts took this fact for the subject of his essay. He dwelt on the sad ravages which had taken place in the neighbourhood as the result of the epidemic, and finished by saying how pleased he was that the dreadful scourge had not visited the school house, "for the Lord delighteth not in the death of the wicked."
A Sympathetic Rendering.—A boy in a Board School recently gave the following rendering of the verse in the "Wreck of the Hesperus":—
"Then up and spake an old sailor,
Had sailed the Spanish main;
'I pray thee put into yonder port,
For I fear the horrid cane.'"
Heaven-sent Physic.—The Diocesan Inspector: "Now, my dear children, tell me how Sodom and Gomorrah were destroyed." Sharp Boy: "Brimstone and treacle from heaven, sir."