A Lesson on Fractions.—Teacher (giving lesson on fractions): "Here, children, is a piece of meat; if I cut it in two, what shall I have?" Class (tutti): "Halves!" Teacher: "And if I cut my pieces again in two, what do I get?" Class (tutti): "Quarters!" Teacher: "And if I again do the same?" Class (half-chorus): "Eighths!" Teacher: "Good. If we continue in the same way, what shall we have?" Class (a duet): "Sixteenths!" Teacher: "Very good. Let us cut our pieces once more in two, what then shall we have?" Class: Several bars rest. Dead silence. However, in the corner one pair of eyes twinkled. Teacher: "Well, Johnny, what shall we have?" Johnny (solo): "Mincemeat, ma'am!"
"Don't be Afraid, Fido."—A little dog was trembling with fear at the high wind. Little Polly put her arms round it, saying: "Don't be afraid, Fido; all the hairs of your head are numbered."
The Thing that there Isn't.—"What is a nib?" asked a little reader of four years. "Oh, I know!" said Dick; "it is that thing that there isn't when you buy a pen."
A Quaint Prayer.—A dear little child was saying her prayers aloud beside her mother's knee, and added a prayer on her own account: "Oh, please, dear God, make me pure, absolutely pure as Epps' cocoa."
What he did for a Living.—Teacher: "Now, John, what did Moses do for a living while he was staying with Jethro?" John: "Please, sir, he married one of his daughters."