"On Satdy."—Composition exercise by a nine-year-old: "On Satdy I do all the work, and then I go over and do all my Ants, in the afternoon I take Missis greens baby out in the Pram, i get a apeny on Satdy, sumtimes I by bulls i's. On Satdy nite I have a baf and wate up for my farther."
The Soul of Wit.—The teacher had given to each of a junior class a simple and familiar subject for composition. For twenty minutes the class composed, and was composed. The genius of the little group had been instructed to write about "Our Cat." The result of his twenty minutes deep cogitation and tremendous effort was the following essay, almost matchless for brevity, clearness, completeness, and, moreover, depth of pathos: "Our cat is dead!"
A Bit on Each Way.—Some lads who were beginning to write composition were told to write an essay on the horse. One lad had given a good description of the animal and wished to write something about its tail. He wrote the following sentence: "The horse sometimes has a long tail or tale." When asked why he had written down the two words he replied that "he thought that if one was marked wrong the other would sure to be right."
The Exception.—The Tenth Commandment, up to date, as given at a recent Scripture examination by a lad of seven summers: "Thou shalt not covet my nabours wife, thou shalt not covet my nabours house, nor his servant nor his made nor his ox nor is ass nor anything but is ears."
See that Ye Fall Not Out.—Down in Hampshire a curate was giving a Scripture lesson on Joseph and his brethren. He asked the boys why Joseph said, "See that ye fall not out by the way." A boy from a neighbouring village, used to riding about the farm, replied, "Cause they had no tailboord to the caart."