The Postman.—"The postman has to be up erly in the morning to meet the males at the station. Then he takes them to the G.P.O. where they are soughted out. Then he ties up his streets in bungles, and goes quickly from door to door, because the passengers dont' like to have their letters delaid. On his way back, he collects the pillow boxes, and conveys them to the G.P.O. Inside the postmen they are stamping letters. The postman is a simple servent because he works for the goverment and wear a uniform. He has a good time at Xmas I should like to be a postman then. He gets plenty of Xmas boxes and can read all the picture postcards."
Exactly.—The other week Standard V. were asked to write an essay on "My Home." This is how one boy commenced: "Our house is in Peel Green Road. It is on the left side going up, and the right side coming down."
On Girls.—By a boy.—"There are two sorts of children, boys and girls and of the two boys are the best. Girls cause all the rows and quarrels. They think they are wonderful if they can get a bird's feather stuck in their hat. They are proud and vain and are always gossipping and making mischief. I simply hate them. They boast of what they can do, this that and the other and a fat lot it is when it comes to the put. If there were no girls and women in the world, it would be a very peaceful place. They love to sit and rest. Girls do vary from day to day. On washing days they think they are nearly killed. They would rather gossip half a day, than walk half a mile. Its no good, they are a bad race and deceitful. If your wife sells anything she keeps a shilling back. Girls like to wear rings and think they are ladies. They bob their hair on the top like mountains and wears a fringe to make us boys think they are pretty, but aint they just deceived. The young men have a hard job to find a good and hard working wife in these days. Girls are cowards and I never knew one to face danger. If a cow looks at them they run and cry. Boys go about with their eyes open and their mouths shut, just the opposite to girls. Boys are also strong and useful while girls are timid, frightened weak little creatures. I would not be a girl for £10."
"Your Grace."—A certain duchess, well known for the interest she takes in the progress of education, once visited a school in L—— and began to talk freely to a mite in the first standard. Several questions were put to the child, to which the latter replied, "Yes, ma'am," or "No, ma'am." The teacher of the class was annoyed at the frequency with which the scholar used the word "ma'am," and at last said, "You must say 'Your Grace.'" The duchess laughed heartily when the child began, "Lord, make us truly thankful, &c."
About a "Cinmattergraf."—"We had a grand cinmattergraf at school on November 30th by Eddyston. Eddyston is America man. He invented to make it. Cinmattergraf works very fonny. If you swing a stone round it is in your eye a tenth of a cetend after you have stopet. If you are in a dark room and somebody brings a light it is in your eye a tenth of a cetend. The cinmattergraf is like a fonagrapt. It is like a mager lantin. A cinmattergraf is eaquil to five thousand candles. The ribbing rowls off one rowler on to another rowler. The cinmattergraf was worked by angle. It is like a soingnmersheen. It will play any song. The cinmattergraf talks like people. You cant understand what a gramophone says. When you light the oxgin it not give much light. When one of the things is burken the other blows in and it give bleu light. When the man shows the foters he has to put the lamp out. Because if he does not put the lamp out the pictures look shady. It is the light which helps to show the pictures. The pictures on the cinmattergraf are only an inch big. One picture that it showed was a woman laughting, and you could see every form her mouth was in. When all the pictures were put together they were a quarter of a mile long."