His scheme fell through;

For the maid, when his love took formal shape,

Expressed such terror

At his monstrous error,

That he stammered an apology and made his ’scape,

The picture of a disconcerted ape.

With a view to rise in the social scale,

He shaved his bristles and he docked his tail;

He grew mustachios, and he took his tub,

And he paid a guinea to a toilet club.