WASTED SYMPATHY

Whilst making some purchases in a village shop in Scotland the other day, an excited inhabitant rushed in with the news:—

“Tam Henry’s gaun awa’ wi’ the sodgers!”

The shopkeeper remarked dolefully:—

“My, the auld wife’ll miss him sairly.”

When the visitor had left to carry her news elsewhere, a customer inquired sympathetically if “Tam Henry” was the old woman’s only son.

“Naw, naw,” the shopkeeper answered with a pitying smile, “Tam Henry’s her best hoarse!”

KNEW HIM OF OLD

A certain recruiting sergeant was sent by the military authorities to his native town, with a view to getting as many of his acquaintances to enlist as possible.