“Aye, if tha likes,” responded the soldier.

“There you are,” commented the officer shortly afterwards, as he handed over the spade.

“Tha shapes pratty weel,” said the private, a collier from the Durham pits, “for a novice.”

NO EXCEPTION

Policeman (arresting burglar)—“Ain’t people worried enough by this war without burglaring their houses?”

Burglar—“All the papers are saying ‘business as usual.’”

IN HIS OWN LANGUAGE

Bill Bates, a coal miner, had joined Kitchener’s Army, and was undergoing musketry instruction.

The officer had been at some pains to impress upon the recruits that in loading a rifle they should place one cartridge in the barrel and ten in the magazine.