“Man,” said the first, “dem Germany submaroons is sho’ly gwine to sink de British navy. Yas, sir-ee, dey’s sho’ly gwine to ’splode dem naval boats dat’s waitin’ out yonda.”
“Sho!” said porter number two. “An’ what’s gwine ter happen den?”
“Why, dem Germany submaroons’ll come right on ’cross de ocean an’ splode de rest ob de naval boats ob de world. Dat’s what’ll happen den, Sambo!”
“Well, looky heah, Gawge. Ain’t yo’ an’ me better decla’ ouahselves a couple o’ noot—nootral—nootralities?”
“Man,” said Gawge, “yo’ all kin be a nootrality if yo’ wants to. Ah’m a German!”
TOMMY ATKINS EXPLAINS WHY “IT’S A LONG WAY TO TIPPERARY”
Scene: A street in a French town. Enter Thomas Atkins, singing; he meets Jean Pioupiou.
T. A.—“‘It’s a long, long way to Tipperary, it’s—’ Halloa, cocky—how goes it?” (Holds out his hand, genially.)
J. P.—“Ah, mon cher ami! ‘For eeze a zholi good fellow,’ nest-ce-pas?” (Attempts to embrace his new friend.)
T. A.—“Whoa, mare—steady on! You make me blush, old sport—it’s not the thing where we come from. Kiss the girls—not half! But the men—not in these!”