“Well, I like to show consideration to men serving their country,” said the magistrate. “Would you like something now?”
“Yes, I could do with tea and bread and butter,” the soldier answered.
“All right,” said the magistrate, but the soldier amended his request.
“Can I have tea, bread and butter and cheese?” he asked.
“Oh, yes,” said the magistrate, laughing, “but take him away, jailer, before he asks for champagne and oysters.”
CAPTURED, NOT STOLEN
A British soldier in Belgium was one morning wending his way to camp with a fine rooster in his arms when he was stopped by his colonel to know if he had been stealing chickens.
“No, colonel,” was the reply, “I saw the old fellow sitting on the wall and I ordered him to crow for England, and he wouldn’t, so I just took him prisoner.”