AT A PARIS HOTEL

“My plate is damp.”

“Hush!” whispered his wife. “That’s your soup. They serve small portions in war time.”

THE LAST RESORT

Frau von Schmidt (of Berlin)—“Otto, where are we going for holidays this summer?”

Otto—“Well—er—there’s Turkey.”

CRUEL SPITE

Village Haberdasher—“Yew take it from me, sir, folk in our village be very spiteful agin the Germans. Why, Oi reckon Oi’ve sold fifty ’ankerchers wi’ Kitchener’s face on ’em!”

AN UNLOVED OFFICIAL