ENOUGH IS TOO MUCH
“Are you going to the Wallerby reception tonight?”
“No. The Twobbles will be there, so I declined my invitation.”
“Why do you object to the presence of the Twobbles?”
“I don’t object to their presence particularly, but I have already heard them tell the story of their escape from Berlin ten or twelve times, and I don’t feel equal to another recital.”
TELLING HIM ALL ABOUT IT
The recruits were going through their first course of musketry, and they were in charge of a full-blown second lieutenant, who was trying to show his authority, together with his great knowledge of musketry. Sauntering up to the latest recruit, he said:—
“See here, my man, this thing is a rifle; this is the barrel, this is the butt, and this is where you put the cartridge in.”
The recruit seemed to be taking it all in, so the officer, continuing, said:—
“You put the weapon to your shoulder; these little things on the barrel are called sights; then to fire you pull this little thing, which is called the trigger. Now smarten yourself up, and remember what I have told you, and, by the way, what trade did you follow before you enlisted?—a collier, I suppose.”