They were a very saving old couple, and as a result they had a beautifully furnished house. One day the old woman missed her husband. "Joseph, where are you?" she called out.
"I'm resting in the parlor," came the reply.
"What, on the sofy?" cried the old woman, horrified.
"No, on the floor."
"Not on that grand carpet!" came in tones of anguish.
"No; I've rolled it up!"
HOW COULD HE KNOW?
The youth seated himself in the dentist's chair. He wore a wonderful striped shirt and a more wonderful checked suit and had the vacant stare of "nobody home" that goes with both.
The dentist looked at his assistant. "I am afraid to give him gas," he said.
"Why?" asked the assistant.