When the festival began she fairly glistened with attractive confectionery, but as time wore on her decorations grew less. Finally, at the end of the last act, not a bonbon was to be seen.
"Why, Dora," cried the stage manager, "where in the world are all your decorations? Have you lost them?"
"Oh, no," replied Dora; "they're perfectly safe. I'm wearing them inside."
THEIR OPPORTUNITY
In war times Cupid is not only active but overworked, and people who have never loved before do not wait upon ceremony. In the spring of 1918, a certain rector, just before the service, was called to the vestibule to meet a couple who wanted to be married. He explained that there wasn't time for the ceremony then. "But," said he, "if you will be seated I will give you an opportunity at the end of the service for you to come forward, and I will then perform the ceremony."
The couple agreed, and after a stirring war sermon at the proper moment the clergyman said: "Will those who wish to be united in the holy bond of matrimony please come forward?"
Thereupon thirteen women and one man proceeded to the altar.
DOING HIS DUTY, BUT—
That time-honored subject the wife who talks and the husband who endures never ceases to be a source of inspiration to the humorist, and it is truly astonishing how many new ways it can be treated:
One day the telephone bell rang with anxious persistence. The doctor answered the call of a tired husband.