AN ACROBAT IN THE SQUAD
Sergeant (drilling awkward squad): "Company! Attention, company! Lift up your left leg and hold it straight out in front of you!"
One of the squad held up his right leg by mistake. This brought his right-hand companion's left leg and his own right leg close together. The officer, seeing this, exclaimed angrily:
"And who is that blooming galoot over there holding up both legs?"
HIS SYSTEM WAS A COMPLETE ONE
We know that the achievements of American business experts are often beyond belief. Whether the following story is true, or is merely a satire, must be left to the judgment of the acute reader:
"May I have a few moments' private conversation?"
The faultlessly dressed gentleman addressed the portly business man, standing upon the threshold of his office.
"This is a business proposition, sir," he said, rapidly closing the door and sinking into a seat beside the desk. "I am not a book agent, nor have I any article to sell. I have come to see you about your wife."
"My wife!"