The verdict, reached in one minute, was "Not guilty."
SMARTY
A full-blown second lieutenant was endeavoring to display his great knowledge of musketry. Sauntering up to the latest recruit, he said:
"See here, my man, this thing is a rifle, this is the barrel, this is the butt, and this is where you put the cartridge in."
The recruit seemed to be taking it all in, so the officer, continuing, said:
"You put the weapon to your shoulder; these little things on the barrel are called sights; then to fire you pull this little thing, which is called the trigger. Now, smarten yourself up, and remember what I have told you; and, by the way, what trade did you follow before you enlisted? A collier, I suppose!"
"No, sir," came the reply; "I only worked as a gunsmith for the
Government Small Arms Factory."
THE ECLIPSE TO ORDER
On the evening before a solar eclipse the colonel of a German regiment of infantry sent for all the sergeants and said to them:
"There will be an eclipse of the sun to-morrow. The regiment will meet on the parade ground in undress. I will come and explain the eclipse before drill. If the sky is cloudy the men will meet in the drill shed, as usual."