In a New York churchyard:

We shall miss thee, mother.
(Job printing neatly done.)

At East Thompson, N. Y.:

Here lies one who never sacrificed his reason to superstitious God, nor ever believed that Jonah swallowed the whale

Alpha White, weight 300 pounds.
Open wide ye golden gates
That lead to the heavenly shore,
Our father suffered in passing through
And mother weighs much more

He's done a catching cod
And gone to meet his God.