BRO. LAMKINS—"De Jedge done give 'im two mumfs in de jayul."
PARSON WHITE—"'Pears ter me like as if you outer be pow'ful thankful. He got off mighty light, he did."
BRO. LAMKINS—"'Twan't 's light's you seem to think. Dey's agwinter hang 'im when de two mumfs is up."
"Rastus," said the judge sternly, "you're plain no-account and shiftless, and for this fight I'm going to send you away for a year at hard labor."
"Please, Jedge," interrupted Mrs. Rastus from the rear of the court room, "will yo' Honah jes' kinder split dat sentence? Don't send him away from home, but let dat hard labor stand."
A German spy caught redhanded was on his way to be shot.
"I think you English are brutes," he growled, "to march me through this rain and slush."
"Well," said the "Tommy" who was escorting him, "what about me? I have to go back in it."