"Ball four," yelled the ump, "and the man's out."
"How come, I'se out?" inquired the enraged batter.
"I'se repelled to put you out, nigger. Don't you see dar's nowhere else to put you?" reasoned the umpire.
They were getting up a ball game in a small town and lacked one player. They finally persuaded an old fellow to fill in, although he said he had never played before. He went to the bat and the first ball pitched he knocked over the fence. Every one stood and watched the ball, even the batter. Excitedly they told him to run. "Shucks!" he said, "what's the use of running, I'll buy you another ball."
An Englishman was seeing his first game of baseball, and the "fan" was explaining the different plays as they were being made.
"Don't you think it's great?" enthusiastically asked the "fan."
"Well," replied the Englishman, "I think it's very exciting, but also a very dangerous game."
"Dangerous nothing," replied the fan.