CURRENT EVENTS
MRS. BARR—"Henry, what are current events?"
MR. BARR—"Anything shocking, my dear"—Life.
CUSTOM
Foote, the comedian, dined one day at a country inn, and the landlord asked how he liked his fare.
"I have dined as well as any man in England," said Foote.
"Except the mayor," cried the landlord.
"I except nobody," said he.