GIFTS
When the captain of the fire department was about to resign, his men banded together and purchased an elaborate, embossed silver horn to present to him at a meeting in the town hall. The fireman who was chosen to make the presentation practiced his speech for days beforehand. The chief, who had been informed of what was to happen, also practiced his speech of acceptance. They rehearsed together and were "letter perfect" when they mounted the platform in the town hall. The throng which confronted them had, however, a disastrous effect. Holding the horn at arm's length, the fireman stalked across the platform and with a ghastly expression on his face, said:
"Well, Bill, here's your horn!"
The chief rose slowly to his feet and gasped: "Hell! Is that it?"
Not what we give, but what we share,
For the gift without the giver is bare.
—Lowell.
He gives twice who gives quickly.—Syrus.