After Patsy Hogan had left Dublin for the country, and rented a cottage with a small backyard, he returned to town and purchased a monkey. Not a word of his scheme would he disclose to his old cronies.
But afterwards he explained. "'Twas like this: I chained the monkey to a stick in me yard, and the coal thrains were passin' all day, and on iv'ry thrain there was a stoker. In one week I had two tons of coal in me cellar, and the monkey was never wanst hit!"
See also Irish bulls.
JEWS
Pat, answering questions in applying for a job as keeper of the pound, came to the query, "What are rabies and what would you do for them?"
He replied, "Rabies is Jew priests and I wouldn't do a damn thing for them."
Israel Paletzky sold and delivered fresh eggs to a near-by soda dispenser. One day he brought in two dozen eggs in response to an order. Upon counting them, the proprietor of the soda fountain discovered there was an extra egg and offered it back to the aged Jew.