"You must remember, Sam, that you promised to take Liza for better or for worse."
"Yassir, I knows dat, boss," rejoined the darky; "but—but she's wuss dan I took her for."
In one of the big base hospitals of the Army not long ago a new librarian was set to work by the American Library Association. She was a very charming young woman, and very anxious to please all of her "customers," tho some of them didn't even wish to look at a book. In her rounds she approached one of the patients and he declined to be interested in her wares. At the next cot she stopped and offered its occupant a book.
"What's it about?" the patient asked.
"Oh, this is 'Bambi,'" said the librarian. "It's about a girl who married a man without his having anything to say about it."
"Hold on there," shouted the man who had declined all books. He raised himself up on his elbow and reached out his hand. "Give me that book. It's my autobiography."
Miss SNOWFLAKE—"What did Jim Jackson git married for?"
Miss WASHTUBB—"Lawd only knows;—he keeps right on workin'!"