"Why don't you get rid of that mule?" asked one Virginia darky of another.
"Well, yo' see, Jim," replied the other, "I hates to give in. Ef I was to trade dat mule off he'd regard it as a pussunal victory. He's been tryin' fo' de last six weeks to get rid of me."
MUSHROOMS
Johnny Jones, you know, was studying botany, and he declared that he had an infallible way to tell the difference between mushrooms and toadstools.
"When you git vi'lent spasms," said little Johnny, "with cramps, swelling of the feet and partial loss of vision ending in insanity and death—then it ain't mushrooms."
MUSIC
HE—"Most girls, I have found, don't appreciate real music."