"Oh, that's all right! Never mind," returned the host; "no one will ever know the difference."


MUSICAL STUDENT—"That piece you just played is by Mozart, isn't it?"

HURDY-GURDY MAN—"No, by Handel."


When Paderewski was on his last visit to America he was in a Boston suburb, when he was approached by a bootblack who called:

"Shine?"

The great pianist looked down at the youth whose face was streaked with grime and said:

"No, my lad, but if you will wash your face I will give you a quarter."

"All right!" exclaimed the youth, who forthwith ran to a neighboring trough and made his ablutions.