A WILLING MARTYR

Scottish Carrier. “Eh, bit that’s strong whusky! Bit! U’ll no spile the taste wi’ water. U’ll rather thole’t!”

THE RETURN OF THE NATIVE

Tam. “Sae ye’ve gotten back, Sanders?”

Sanders. “’Deed, aye. I’ve just gotten back.”

Jamie. “An’ hoo did ’e like London?”

Sanders. “Od, it’s an ootlandish place yon! They tell’t me they couldna unnerstaun ma awccent!”