With Apollinaris water, for I dare not touch port wine."
Then spake Sir Richard Tankard, "I know you are no funker,
And fly wine for a moment to return to it again,
But my liver and my brain are free from ache and pain.
I should count myself the funker if I left them, my Lord Drunker,
Unsatisfied, and craving for the purple wine of Spain."
He called his friends together to go with him and dine.
He told them of the telegram that told him of the wine.
"We will go for we are dry;
Good Sir Richard, we are thine,