Shortly afterward the old lady reached her umbrella up to the cord and gave it a vigorous pull. The whistle sounded, brakes were put on, the train began to slacken its speed. Presently the conductor came rushing through the train and asked:
"Who pulled the bell?"
"I did," replied the old lady, meekly.
"Well, what do you want?" snapped the official, impatiently.
"You may bring me some ham sandwiches and a cup of tea, if you will."
NO WONDER
A certain well-known scientist in Washington was left in charge of his family of small children, as his wife expected to be absent some hours. Upon her return in the early evening she found the house unusually quiet, and wished to know what had become of the children.
The husband explained that, as they had been rather noisy he himself had put them to bed without waiting for her return.
"I hope they gave you no trouble," she said.
"No," replied the scientist, "with the exception of the one in the cot here. He objected a good deal to my undressing him and putting him to bed."