A NOVEL PULPIT
A Washington correspondent of a religious paper recently assigned to the Rev. Dr. S---- a rather novel pulpit. The Doctor had preached from the text, "The gates of hell shall not prevail against you." He must have been not a little surprised, if he saw the account of the sermon, to read in the words of the correspondent, "Dr. S---- then preached from the gates of hell."
CAUGHT IN HIS OWN NET
Mr. S---- was counsel in a will case for the contestants, who were endeavoring to show that the testator was of unsound mind. One of the dead man's friends was being examined.
"Did not the old man talk to himself when he was alone?" interrogated the lawyer.
"I do not know," replied the witness.
"What!" exclaimed the attorney, "you do not know, and yet you claim to be an intimate friend of his! How can you explain your ignorance of this fact?"
"Because," replied the man, undisturbed, "I was never with him when he was alone."
WHAT SHE WANTED
An old lady on her first railroad trip remarked the bell cord overhead, and was told by a mischievous boy that it was to ring when it was desired to get anything to eat.