"'No, ma'am. He's er Congressman from Tennersee.'"
"OF COURSE"
A husband had given his wife a sum of money and shown her how to deposit it in the bank, and how to pay her little bills thereafter with checks. About a month later she came to him in a high state of indignation.
"Harry," she said, "the other day the bank sent me a note saying I had overdrawn my account and they wanted five dollars and a quarter to balance it. I sent it to them right away, but they were not satisfied. They are still bothering me."
"You say you sent the five and a quarter?"
"I did, that very day," said she.
"That's strange," he commented; "how did you send it?"
"Why, I sent them a check, of course."
HOW TO FOOL THEM
It had long been the custom of a certain Vassar professor to call on the young ladies at recitations in alphabetical order, and it did not take the girls long to figure out just when their turns would come, and neglect or prepare the lessons, accordingly. After years of this system the professor was grieved to find out how the young Portias were taking advantage of him. He chided the girls severely, adding: