“READING THE ‘TOWN AND COUNTRY HERALD’ WITH A LOUD VOICE TO HIMSELF AND HIS BIRDS.”
Very dirty and neglected did the household and surroundings of Uncle Grünebaum look to any respectable woman. In his workshop it looked as if brownies had made their home, not with kindly intentions, but in the most bitter ire. A wilder topsy-turvy can scarcely be pictured. Uncle Grünebaum spent the greater part of his day and of his work-hours in hunting for something or other. The tool he was in search of was never to be found, and rummaging for it did not benefit the general aspect of things. Over and above all there was a perpetual noise of whistling, singing, and screeching birds in large and small cages upon the walls; a tree-frog in a glass by the window foretold the weather. But as for the political weather, Meister Grünebaum foretold it to himself, reading the Town and Country Herald with a loud voice to himself and his birds, an occupation which also took up a good deal of his work-time. The worthy Uncle Grünebaum did only just so much cobbling as was necessary to keep him and his birds alive, and to pay for the Herald. His glass at the alehouse was oftener scored than is good for a respectable citizen and shoemaker.
During this period of his restless life Hans decidedly preferred the street and its details to domestic happiness, to the quiet undisturbed peace of his own home. Oh, thou blessed time of dirty hands and bleeding noses, of torn jackets and rumbled hair! Woe to the man who has never known thee! It were better for him if he had not known some other things which loving relations and friends with the darkly melancholy look blandly praised and recommended!
Wilhelm Raabe.
NEWSPAPER HUMOUR.
Shoemakers Apprentice (passing by a baker’s stand): “Got any stale rolls?”
Baker: “Yes, my lad.”
Apprentice: “Serves you right. You should have sold ’em when they were fresh.”
In Court.—Judge: “How is it that you picked up a number of comparatively worthless articles, and left the money, which was close at hand, untouched?”
Criminal: “I hope your honour won’t find fault with me for that. My wife has been hard enough on me about it.”