And among the good folk which came unto that place was our worthy and trusty Master Owlglass, and he came with the crowd, and was greatly contented therewith. And, behold, there came before him a boor with a roll of leather; and Owlglass perceived what an excellent knavery could be practised. So took he a needle and thread with speed, and deftly sewed a corner of the leathern roll unto his own doublet. In no short space of time did he with his hands pluck by force the piece of leather from the boor, and turned him about, and departed another way among the folk. Thereat marvelled the boor with great marvel, and stood still; but in a little while thereafter departed he after Owlglass, and took him, and said: “Thou knave, thou hast from me stolen my leather.” But Owlglass answered, and said unto him gently: “Nay, friend, thou art unjust towards me. Seest thou not that the leather is mine, for it is sewed unto my coat, so that none may steal it. And hadst thou done so likewise, then couldst thou not have lost thy leather.” And the boor believed the words of Owlglass, and departed elsewhere to seek the leather he had lost.
The Seventy and Second Adventure.
How that at Hildesheim Owlglass did hire himself unto merchant to be his cook, and what tricks he played unto him.
As thou goest down that street at Hildesheim which leadeth from the Haymarket, dwelt, on a time, a rich merchant, and he did come forth unto the gate, and would have entered into his garden. And he passed along, and behold, he found Owlglass lying in a green field, and he greeted him and spake unto him, and would have known of him what manner of man he was, and in what wise he earned his bread. Then with hidden knavery answered Owlglass unto him, and said: “I am a cook, yet have I now no service.” And the merchant said unto him: “If that thou would be pious and diligent, would I myself hire thee, and give unto thee new clothes; for my wife doth every day most bitterly cry out touching the cooking.” Then did Owlglass, with great sincerity, promise and vow unto him obedience. Thereafter hired him the merchant, and asked him what his name might be? And Owlglass answered, and said: “Pan-cra-ti-us.” The merchant said: “Of a truth is this name very long; behold, one cannot with brief time speak it. Thy name shall be Crazy.” And Owlglass answered: “Yea, most excellent master, so mote it be, for it is all one to me, what I am called.” Then did the merchant approve him, and said to him: “Behold, thou art a servant in whom I can have pleasure. Follow me, therefore, and we will get unto my garden before the town, and there gather herbs, and carry home with us young chickens, for on the next Sunday have I guests coming, and I would fain give unto them good cheer.” Owlglass followed him unto the garden, and there cut they rosemary, to make a stuffing for the chickens, after the Italian mode; and they took of onions, and of other herbs good store, and thereto of eggs, and departed, and came home again.
And when the good wife looked upon the strangely apparelled Owlglass, she said unto her husband, and asked him: “What manner of man have ye here? Would ye waste our bread on such a fellow?” And the merchant straightway answered and said: “Be content good wife; to thee shall he be obedient. Lo! he is a good cook.” And the wife replied unto him: “Yea, good man, I am content, and goodly messes shall he cook for us.” Then said the merchant: “To-morrow shall ye see how bravely he can cook.” And he called Owlglass, and said unto him: “Crazy!” Then spake Owlglass: “Master!” “Go thou and take the meat sack, and follow me unto the shambles, for I would buy meat for the dinner.” Then followed Owlglass his master, and the meat was bought accordingly. Then the merchant enjoined Owlglass, and said unto him: “Behold, take thou the meat and set it me down where it may slowly become cooked, in a cool place, so that it be not burned. And the other meat set me down likewise.” Owlglass answered: “Yea,” and rose up early the next morning, and some of the meat put he unto the fire to roast; but the other put he upon the spit, and laid it in the cellar between two butts of Einbeck beer, so that it could not be burned.
And when the friends of the merchant entered, among them was the town clerk, and many other worthy folk; and the merchant went unto Owlglass, and said unto him: “How doth the meat fare? Hast thou done as I told thee.” “Yea,” said Owlglass, “that have I. For no cooler place in all thy house could I find than the cellar, and there lieth the meat upon a spit between two casks of Einbeck beer.” “But is it not ready then?” asked the merchant. “Nay,” said Owlglass, “I wist not that ye would have it.”
And then came the guests, and the merchant told them how Owlglass had put the meat in the cellar; and thereat laughed they greatly at the merry jest, and so was Owlglass excused. But the good wife was not content therewith by reason of the guests, and besought her husband that he would let him go, for well saw she that he was a knave. Then said the merchant: “Dear wife, behold! I fain would have his services to assist me when that I go unto the town of Goslar; be patient, and when that I return thence will I bid him depart in God’s name.” And they sate and made good cheer, and drank good wine, and had much comfort; and at eventide the merchant called for Owlglass, and said unto him: “Toll, prepare thou the coach and smear it right well, for to-morrow will we depart unto Goslar, and with us doth ride that good priest, Master Henry Hamenstede, for there abideth he, and will go with us.” Then said Owlglass unto his master: “Yea, he would do his bidding.” And he inquired of him, saying: “What manner of unction shall I use to smear the coach withal?” The merchant cast down a shilling for him to take, and said unto him: “Go ye straightway and buy ye cart grease, and that unction will serve thee as well as any other.” And the obedient Owlglass did, therefore, according unto the words of his master.
When that all men had gat them to bed, stood our Master Owlglass and smeared the coach within and without with the cart grease the which he had bought, and on that spot where his master sate smeared he the most. In the morning arose his master, and came with the priest unto the coach, and commanded that he should put the horses unto the coach; and that also did Owlglass. And then departed they in the coach; and as they went forward, the grease with the which Owlglass had greased the seat began to smell with no sweet savour, and the priest opened his mouth, and spake unto the merchant, saying: “Lo! what is this? There is a savour in this coach which savoureth not of a goodly savour. And when that I would hold me unto the sides of the coach, for as much as it jolteth and jarreth me, then are my hands covered over with grease, the which love I not.” Then commanded they Owlglass that he should stop, and then told they him that of a truth were they smeared all over with grease, and with grievous anger visited they our good master.
Then cometh by a peasant with a load of straw, going unto the market; of him bought they sundry bundles, and they wiped the coach, and all their clothes, and again gat them in. And the merchant spake with great anger unto Owlglass, and said unto him: “Thou evil and most beguiling knave, what is this thing which thou hast done? Get ye unto the town gallows with all speed.” And Owlglass did as he was commanded, and when that he came unto the gallows tree, he stayed the coach, and unharnessed the horses thereof. Then cried the merchant unto Owlglass, with a loud voice: “What is this other thing which thou hast done, thou knave?” And Owlglass said: “Of a truth bid ye me drive unto the town gallows, and there stand we. I thought that here would ye rest.” Then looked the merchant and perceived the place where they stood, and the gallows thereby. What could these worthy men do? Was it not the best to laugh thereat as they might. So laughed they; but the merchant said unto Owlglass: “Now do thou drive straight forward, and look not round in any wise.” Then drew Owlglass the pole from out of the carriage, and drave the horses forward.
And it came to pass, when that they had driven some small distance, that the fore-part of the coach was from the hinder part loosened, and the merchant and the priest sate within, and abode standing on the road. They cried aloud unto Owlglass, but he would not look round, but departed with the fore-part of the coach and the horse, and cast not his eyes behind to see what had happened. And though they pursued him, was it a long time ere they came up with him. Then would the merchant have killed him, but the priest would not have this done. And when that the journey was ended, said the merchant’s wife unto him: “What manner of voyage hast thou had?” And the merchant answered unto her: “Marvellous strange hath it been; yet have we returned back again with safety.” Then called he Owlglass, and said unto him: “Hear me what I say, fellow voyager. This night mayest thou yet remain here with me, and thou mayest also bravely eat and drink. To-morrow morn do thou rise up and clear me the house that I may be quit of thee and of thy company. For a knave art thou wheresoever thou wert born.” Then said the poor and worthy Master Owlglass: “Dear heart of me! all that is required of me that do I, but no one giveth me thanks therefor. Yet my service contenteth me not, then according as thou commandest will I in the morning clear the house and get me hence.” “Yea, so do thou,” said the merchant.