We are told that "Gen. Sherman was always coolest when on the point of attack." Most people are hottest when on the point of a tack.
"I wish the hot weather would come along," sighed the thermometer. "People are beginning to look upon me as a thing of low degree."
"I wouldn't stand for that if I were you. Why don't you call him a liar?"
"That's just what I'll do. Where, where is your telephone?"
"This," murmured the demure maiden, when her lover nudged up still closer on the sofa, "is the closest call I've ever had."