"There is a continual 'hello' around her head."


A husband and wife are considered one, but it is useless to try to work that gag on the landlord when he presents the board bill.


"You haven't a cent, and yet wish to marry Miss Bilyan. Don't you expect her father to kick you out?"

"Oh, no I intend to go before the footlights."


Young M.D.—That jig is up.

Old M.D.—What do you mean?

Young M.D.—That fellow with St. Vitus's dance died this morning.