Mike—Oh; he wur killed in a foight.
"You shouldn't drink your whiskey without water."
"Why not?"
"You'll ruin the coat of your stomach."
"Oh, well-it's an old coat, anyhow."
"Why do they make those Oriental pipes with bowls as big as water pitchers?" asked the inquisitive girl.
"Those," answered the wise woman, "are for men who have promised that they will confine their smoking to one pipe after each meal."