"Why are you sad, Bill?"

"Oh, I am troubled with dyspepsia."

"How can that be?"

"I got licked at school 'cause I couldn't spell it."


Mrs. Limberchin—I was so mad last night I couldn't speak.

Mr. L.—And I was away! Just my luck!


—"That Jersey murderer was clever to get off as he did, wasn't he?"

—"What was his plea—insanity?"