"I suppose," commented a friend, "that when you were in England you did as the English do and dropped your H's."
"No," moodily responded the returned traveller; "I didn't. I did as the Americans do. I dropped my V's and X's."
Then he slowly meandered down to the bank to see if he couldn't get the mortgage extended.—W. Hanny.
A number of tourists were recently looking down the crater of Vesuvius. An American gentleman said to his companion.
"That looks a good deal like the infernal regions."
An English lady, overhearing the remark, said to another:
"Good gracious! How these Americans do travel."
An American tourist hailing from the west was out sight-seeing in London. They took him aboard the old battle-ship Victory, which was Lord Nelson's flagship in several of his most famous naval triumphs. An English sailor escorted the American over the vessel, and coming to a raised brass tablet on the deck he said, as he reverently removed his hat: