"Jock, mon, I'll go ye a roond on the links in the morrn'."
"The morrn'?" Jock repeated.
"Aye, mon, the morrn'," said Sandy. "I'll go ye a roond on the links in the morrn'."
"Aye, weel," said Jock, "I'll go ye. But I had intended to get marriet in the morrn'."
GOLFER (unsteadied by Christmas luncheon) to Opponent—
"Sir, I wish you clearly to understand that I resent your unwarrant—your interference with my game, sir! Tilt the green once more, sir, and I chuck the match."
Doctor William S. Rainsford is an inveterate golf player. When he was rector of St. George's Church, in New York City, he was badly beaten on the links by one of his vestrymen. To console the clergyman the vestryman ventured to say: "Never mind, Doctor, you'll get satisfaction some day when I pass away. Then you'll read the burial service over me."
"I don't see any satisfaction in that," answered the clergy-man, "for you'll still be in the hole."